WARNING: This is a story about shame. So if you don't want to read about me making an IDIOT of myself, you should stop now.
Anyway. Y'all know how much I love a rhubarb pie from Croshaw's here in Santa Jorge. What you may not know is how much I love their little beef meat pies, too. Which they don't sell until 11:00. Well, I was there buying my rhubarb at 10:52. I know this because I looked at my watch. And when it was my turn, I put on my Charm Face and said, "I know it's five minutes early but could I get a beef pie, too?"
To my AMAZEMENT the young (dopey) male teenager helping me said nope. Nope as in SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP BEFORE I GIVE YOU AN"F" TODAY." So then I said really? So then he said you can wait for five minutes, can't you? And I said no. I can't wait. And then he said HEY! WHY DON'T I SPIT IN YOUR PIE!
He didn't say that, actually. But I could tell he was saying it in his heart.
Anyway. I didn't get a beef pie because I didn't want to wait and I had places to be anyway, such as K-Mart across the street.
But I was soon peeved that I didn't get a beef pie (and also my own way) that I did something I have never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever done in my entire non-aggressive life. I called the manager while sitting in the K-Mart parking lot and told him I couldn't believe they wouldn't sell me a pie at 10:55.
He was gracious and suddenly I felt like a raging moron. Why was I calling a pie guy from a K-Mart parking lot because I was so mad I could feel my eyeballs squirt out of my head and onto the floor?
I truly despised myself at the moment. Although yes. I still want that beef pie.
So then I had to ask myself this question: What am I really angry about?
I'm pretty sure it's not just pie.
Louise Plummer once told me that when people are behaving badly, you should ask yourself what they're afraid of. And now I need to examine myself and honestly answer what's going on with me right now. Because I'm scaring people.
Although apparently not enough to make them give me a pie.
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7 comments:
Ugghhhhhh, this is so meeeeeeee. So painful to read. And lovely too.
Hi Ann. Haven't stopped by your blog in a while. So happy I did.
Ha ha ha. You turned into a "law and order" person. So not you.
Well I hope you find the answer, and that you get yourself some beef in a pie, too, for heaven's sake. And hey! We're in Santa Jorge as well. We may need to find this Croshaw's of which you speak.
I **Love** Louise's comment there. I can so see myself in your shoes, Ann, so just let yourself off that hook, and for the love of everything holy I hope you got yourself a beef pie. xo
Yes, but when you think about it, isn't it more crazy that they wouldn't sell you a pie five minutes early? I mean, they obviously had them available (as they would need to have them in 5 minutes) and then you would be giving them more money which is sort of the whole concept of a business.
So yeah, you're not the crazy. They are.
Mostly I just wish I was in the passenger seat.
Louise Plummer is totally right, I just came from a class that instilled that in me. Don't worry, we are all afraid of something. Own it, identify it and let yourself feel it....whether its anger, resentment.....whatever. Once you do ask the Savior to take it....and then you are left with forgiveness. And then go have a meat pie.
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