Thursday, July 1, 2010

Fictionalizing for fun and for profit

First, thanks for your well wishes in re to Chloe Ann. They are much appreciated.

Second, I am starting to train for the St. George marathon. Right now I'm running in Liberty Park first thing in the morning and if it weren't for my iPOD I would be dead already from boredom. But I started a new diversion today. Every time I saw someone I tried to make up a beginning sentence of a novel about them. They're pretty lame. But at least it was something to do.

SENTENCE ABOUT THE LADY WITH TWO PIT BULLS: "A cop pulled up alongside Martha as she walked Gracie and George around the park and said, 'We've had a report that two dogs matching the description of these here animals were involved in an attack on the owner of the Shave Ice Sno-Shak."

SENTENCE ABOUT THE LADY WITH ONE DOG AND ONE BABY: "Her husband put down his coffee mug as she walked through the door and said, 'I want a divorce. You keep the dog. I get the baby.'"

SENTENCE ABOUT THE LADY IN A MINIVAN WITH A BUMPER STICKER THAT SAYS 'I LOVE MY CUB SCOUT': "Life had been good while her son was a cub scout. But then he became a Webelo."

12 comments:

Amelia said...

That Weblo one has legs... I like it.
And... congrats! Grandmother!

Amy said...

I'm a little concern about your sanity (based on "secondly") but an insane runner makes for some great reading!

Best of luck in training.

May I recommend NOT listening to "These Is My Words" or any pioneer story while running? You'll find your feet pull off the pavement slower than the oxen's pull out of the heavy mud. Just sayin'.

Erin said...

I love your sentences about people. Maybe that is why I find running so boring. I will have to try your suggestion, although if I saw the woman to two pit bulls I would have to keep saying, "Don't panic, Don't panic, they can sense your fear." Then I would sprint in the opposite direction.

Congrats for getting in the St. George Marathon. Travis is doing it as well. So is Christie. It will be a family affair.

Lisa B. said...

Marathon! WELL. I am impressed, my dear. Furthermore, maybe you should take up writing one of these novels whilst training, because you could get a novel going with any one of these sentences. I am enamored of the Webelo one and also the "you get the dog, I get the baby" one. Just add one sentence every day. Or two. You could have a draft done by this time next year. You're training until next year, right?

Kerri said...

Do you have This American Life downloaded to your iPod? Those save me on long runs. But I may have to try making up sentences.

Congrats on the St. George lottery grab and good luck!

LucindaF said...

Yay for the marathon! And, I think I should move to the Avenues so we can feed off each others sentences about unsuspecting dog walkers and mothers of webelos.

You're a funny girl, miss Ann.

Louise Plummer said...

Yes, webelos can ruin your life.

Sara Z. said...

Marathon?
Why was I not consulted before you made this decision?
IMHO: 2 miles is as good as 26!

I think you need to write the Webelo story.

BBB said...

Running around the neighborhood is one thing, but I frankly don't understand people who are able to train for marathons on treadmills. I mean, talk about watching paint dry, I just can't do it.

I do usually enjoy running outside but have to have my iPod and I usually have to be alone. I want to go at my own pace and be pushed by myself to go harder, not anyone else. It's like running PMS or something.

Jogging with a stoller... it kicks my trash but I'm slowly adjusting. I have secret hopes that the next time I go running without the stroller I'll have superhuman running powers.

I love the first sentence idea, can't wait to see more.

Geeoff said...

And there it was, the mother of all golf balls.

Josh and Kallie said...

I just love reading your blog, and I love talking to you even more than that! Thanks for the fun time last night. I can't wait to see you again today! Yay for celebrations!!!!

Donna said...

I love it...I am going to do that all day. "mother cleans room of son who has been gone for 2 years...uncovers the mystery of disappearance of Jimmy Hoffa."
How's that?