It's been an intense few weeks. First there was getting ready for WIFYR. Then there was WIFYR. And then there was the Edwards Family Beach Week. And now there's re-entry into my normal life.
Beach Week, as always, was terrific. And occasionally fraught. But terrific. And occasionally fraught. You can't get that many family members under one roof and not have those "moments"--the ones that require you to apologize to someone later.
In my case I needed to apologize to TRQ for getting sharpish with her in front of several of her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. I felt terrible as soon as I snapped at her. Still do, in fact, although she was very gracious and kinder to me than I deserved right then.
I've been trying to understand what happened and here's what I think was going on. TRQ and I were both playing the role of Uber-Mother, running around the room taking everyone's emotional temperature. And that, my friends, can be exhausting. By the end of the week, we were both REALLY tired. And when that kind of tired happens? Words.
I was texting all of this to Lisa B. while Ken Cannon and I were driving home yesterday, saying I'M SUCH AN IDIOT and NO ONE ASKED ME TO TAKE THEIR EMOTIONAL TEMPERATURE and WHY DID I SET MYSELF UP? And she very calmly reminded me that in our culture women are asked to and expected to do all kinds of care-taking. She's right. And I appreciated her pointing this out to me.
But now I'm home. And there were strange visiting gnomes on our porch when we returned. So it's all home sweet gnome. And when next summer comes, hopefully I'll be at the beach again. Like my brother Jimmy says, "We keep on going back."
Like the swallows.