Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Why I am Happy I Live in the Year of Our Lord, 2012

Because I can watch football.

I seriously think 100 years from now there will be no more football.  And, in fact, people will look back at football the way we look back at gladiators.  Or those Mayans who played lacrosse with real heads.  Or whatever.  Really?  People will say to each other?  People actually played football?  AND WATCHED IT?!!!  How barbaric!

But I love to watch it.  So much.  So, so, so much.  And I will keep watching it until I die, along with drinking soda until I die, although I may be forced in a few years to stand 20 feet away from all public buildings while doing so.  Watching football.  And drinking soda.  And drinking soda while watching football.


Lisa B. said...

One of the only reasons I know that football has something to recommend it is that you love it.

Carry on.

James said...

Football is great for a lot of reasons: game day atmosphere, strategy, controlled violence, sometimes uncontrolled violence, speed, emotion, human achievement, pathos, precision, etc. Plus the shape of the ball makes it interesting. Get the roundness out of the "ball" game. Let the oblong shape bounce a little crazy. I know rugby has an oblong ball, which I respect, but our ball is better. It has strings. Strings it to assist in throwing it overhanded for for distance, velocity, and accuracy. Football is great for a lot of reasons...not the least of which it is great to watch.

Louise Plummer said...

Is it still a pig? The football, I mean. It's taken me twenty-four hours to figure out why you would be standing 20 feet from a building drinking your Dr. Pepper. I get it. I get it!

I personally hate the entire organic vegetable movement. It's simply a ruse for me to pay big bucks for a dumb bunch of radishes. I can't carry a gun into Harmons, or I'd have to shoot the produce manager.