Remember the nose horn? The one the doctor removed and then said everything looked fine?
Well, the biopsy came back and the "nose horn" was, in fact, a "squamous cancer thing." The nurse told me this over the phone yesterday.
ME: Does this mean I have nose cancer?
NURSE: No.
ME: Will you guys have to chop off my nose?
NURSE: No.
ME: What do I have to do then?
NURSE: Put Carac on your nose every day for four weeks and then come see us again.
ME: Socially or professionally?
NURSE: What is wrong with you?
I'm kidding about those last two lines of dialogue. But the Carac part was true, so I picked it up from the pharmacy last night and (for the first time in my life) read the directions and also the side effects part, which WHY? If you have to use something, you have to use something, so why even inform yourself about the side effects? Especially when the side effects include "temporary hair loss" or "abnormal taste in the mouth."
What is this, I said to Ken Cannon. Chemo in a tube?
Anyway. This is not a big deal. But it makes for a good blog post, right?
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5 comments:
Absolutely makes a good blog post! And what's a nose without a horn? Cancer-free, I'm thinkin'. Love you, Ms. Ann!
Love hearing about the "nose horn". People need a little lift when it comes to cancer. It's such a downer! I'm challenging to another great column.
HA! Any blog post that makes me laugh is excellent, especially when it's made up conversation. You could go on with that Nurse, I'm sure, and really get into some good therapy.
Good luck with your horn prevention.
Small blessings come in different ways. Some are shaped like a nose horn. Better to know now than too late.
I shall make no comments whatsoever involving the word "horny." You're welcome.
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