This morning I was in a gift shop that had these tiny little roll-on perfumes. They kinda looked like mini-deodorants, but they were from FRANCE, so of course they were way cooler than mini-deodorants. I decided to try on the "verbena" scent and gave myself a pretty thorough going over with the tester right there in the middle of the store. (Which reminds me, actually, of the time my little brother basically poured a bottle of Aqua Velva all over himself before going to a school dance. He was so potent we made him sleep in the back yard for a few months until the scent wore off.)
Anyhoo! I walked out of the gift shop smelling like a bottle of Lemon Pledge, and I was all really? Listen here, Fancypants Verbena Solid Perfume Stick! I don't care if you're from France. Who thought this fragrance was a good idea for human beings? Like, is any man out there gonna say, "My lady, she is so sexy. Girlfriend smells just like a newly polished piano."
I don't think so.
And now please excuse me while I go camp out in the backyard for the next few months.
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8 comments:
"Like, is any man out there gonna say, 'My lady, she is so sexy. Girlfriend smells just like a newly polished piano.'"
Oh, Ann, thanks for the laugh!
LOL. Almost everything French seems sexy and a good idea. But usually when the French have a bad idea, it's a REALLY bad idea. No inbetween there - Sexy-hot-wonderful, or stinky (literally). :)
ALL perfume is a bad idea. Is it ever subtle?
ahaahahahahahahahahahHA! ditto. I bought a fancy bottle of verbena something or other on the Island of Catalina. And I was thinking it was like in my youth, when I loved Love Fresh Lemon, which I still do with all my heart and soul. But really, it was all about furniture polish. NOT GOOD, people. Also: WHY.
I'm okay if you want to smell like verbena (far away from me!), but please don't put Pledge on your piano. It isn't actually furniture.
Ann, thanks for making me laugh - out loud!
On the plus side, the lemon scent will keep the mosquitos away, like one of those candle things you're supposed to burn at a picnic (but not too close to the food - I wonder why that is?)
Once upon a childhood when wandering the aisles of Woolworth's Five and Dime was a favorite pastime, I fell in love with two fragrances: Evening in Paris AND Blue Waltz Parfum, moi tres, tres favorite! The greatest joy, as I remember it, was that my 25-cent allowance could purchase a bottle. But after a couple of bottles, Mom cut off my allowance.
Thanks for the laughs and the memories!
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