For years I've wanted to be on Jeopardy. Not just be on Jeopardy. DOMINATE on Jeopardy. I want to be the Ultimate Jeopardy Cage Fighter. And I've always thought I had a decent shot at it because whenever I watch Jeopardy at home, I bust out my cage fighter moves and answer almost every question except for the mixed drinks part, because what can you expect from a girl who's favorite alcoholic beverage is NyQuil?
Anyway. Dylan sent me a link for an online tryout this week, so I registered and logged in and WENT FOR IT on Wednesday night. But before I went for it, I (this is the truth) drank some fluids and rubbed a little Ben Gay on my calves because Ben Gay is the fragrance of champions. I thought it would inspire me.
Soooooo. The test started. I had to answer 50 questions, and I only had 15 seconds per questions. 15 seconds feels like a long time when you're waiting for the microwave to melt you some butter, but it's a really SHORT time when suddenly you're being asked to name (and type!) various bodies of water located on our planet. Also, I was having a hard time reading the screen because my eyes were watering from all the Ben Gay.
Long story short, I don't think I did very well. Which is why from now on I'll just allow certain cherished fantasies to remain cherished fantasies.
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3 comments:
Way to be daring. I'm daunted by the contestants who are always trying to press their buttons because they know the answers, but are being beaten out by faster button pressers. I'm also afraid I would make fun of Alex Trebek when he tries so hard to say something properly or act like he actually knows all the answers.
A: Cherished fantasies.
Q: What are the best kind of fantasies?
A: Resulting in massive amounts of joy.
Q: what happens when reading this blog.
"...because Ben Gay is the fragrance of champions." YES. I need some.
I'm glad you tried. I bet you did better than you think. True story: my sister in law had a run at gameshows in the 80s and won some prizes. She was on Jeopardy, or as we like to pronounce it, Jeopardie (say it like a French person would--it gives it a certain je ne said quo).
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