Thursday, December 9, 2010

Christmas songs you hate

Let's just agree right now that Christmas is one of those times when we're allowed to be uber sentimental and to freely exercise questionable aesthetic taste. To that end I have my "Creepy Singing Christmas Things" sitting here on the corner of my desk--a snowman that sings "Winter Wonderland," a Scooby-Doo that sings "Reck the Ralls with Roughs of Rolly" and an anxious-looking doll that sings "O Tannenbaum."

No wonder I have a Therapy Fund for all my kids. It was JUST SO SCARY TO GROW UP IN THIS HOUSE!

That said, let me know what holiday songs you hate. And don't feel judged if someone lists one of your secret favorites. I'll get started with one of my sister-in-law's faves--that one about the little boy who wants to buy his mom red shoes for Christmas because she's gonna meet Jesus soon.

Every time I hear it I go REALLY?

20 comments:

wjmom said...

I HATE that stupid Christmas Shoes song. Stupid, stupid, stupid!

But I love Burl Ives singing Holly Jolly Christmas, which--according my aunt--makes me very strange indeed.

Meh, I can live with that.

(I wish I had thought of a therapy fund for my kids years ago. You are just that good.)

Randi said...

I hate Little Drummer Boy. Drives me crazy!

I love the Elvis Christmas record we have!
"Got no sleigh with reindeer, no sack on my back, you're gonna see me comin' in a big black cadillac..."

Tiffany said...

{Shielding myself} The entire Forgotten Carols album. It makes me want to throw things.

Jenny said...

I was going to say the shoe song, but you already got to it. So I'll go with... Christmas Canon by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. You know, with that creepy robotic children's chorus that never stops singing, "Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas..." It makes me want to hit my head against a wall.

raehink said...

Silent Night. We sing it so slowly it becomes a funeral dirge rather than a celebration of His birth night.

donnette perkins said...

"Last Christmas I gave you my heart.
The very next day you gave it away.
This year, to save me from tears,
I'll give it to someone special"

Stupidest lyrics ever and there must be 50 versions. What am I missing?

Cathy said...

I don't like the Christmas Shoes song either and I really HATE Blue Christmas by Elvis.

Amy said...

I hate Oh Holy Night. I'm pretty sure that means I'm going to Hell, but at least I know I'll be listening to something good.

Jana said...

The Little Drummer Boy. I've never heard a redemptive version. (It's #2, right after the Shoes. Oh, spare me the Shoes.)

Valynne said...

I really can't stand Jingle Bell Rock, and Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree . . . and the Christmas Shoes.

I overheard my oldest daughter singing "Deck the Halls with Austin Collie." Can you tell we like football in our house?

Anne said...

Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer and All I Want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth. Ugh. Also Little Drummer Boy is way to much pa rump pa pump paing or whatever it is.

Jarica said...

I'll defend The Little Drummer boy, because I think we could all take a cue from his humility ("I have no gifts to bring/ to lay before a King"). Next time you listen to the song, stop and think of what you would offer your Savior if you were given the opportunity. I would like to think that, having nothing, I, too, would "play my best for him." Isn't this what all good Christians are trying to do on a daily basis any way?

And the best part is, the song reminds us of His atonement: as long as we are doing our best, regardless of what we bring to the table--er, manger--that is enough. He's gracious for what we do and what we offer (as miminal, as in the case of the Drummer Boy, or as extreme, as in the case of the wise men) as that may be.

I will, however, cast my vote for Frosty. "Thumpity-thump-thump, Thumpity-thump-thump." That is far worse than "Pa-rum-pa-pum-pum!"

saleygirl said...

I HATE "I'm Gittin Nothin for Christmas" Aaaargh!
But I do like "Mary Did you Know?"

Louise Plummer said...

Geez. Pah ruppa pum pum.

CSIowa said...

I think donnette is missing being in high school in the 80s.

shelley said...

Any song that sexualizes Santa in any way drives me cuh-razy, a la 'Santa Baby,' or 'I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus.' Ewwww!!!! And they're stupid! And every time I hear 'Santa Baby' I think of the popular big-busted girl who sang it like she was Britney Spears at my 8th grade Christmas concert.

thesixthseason said...

In my office, we've been "chatting" about Christmas songs AND singers that should NOT hit the airwaves. I have to say Scooby-do should stay away from the recording studio.

Heard Yoda sing holiday tunes, I have not; but he sings NOT in future, I hope.

(Please excuse poor Yoda impersonation. By the way, my friend Tiffany says Yoda's sentence structure denotes a Yiddish influence. Does that mean Yoda is Jewish? If so, that might be another reason he may not want to sing Christmas CAROLS. Just sayin'.) Renae

Donna said...

I am afraid for us all....this is Christmas Carma at it's worst! Are you serious! Do you want coal in your stocking? Santa to mysteriously miss your house even though there is a huge "Donna lives right here" in flashing red and green neon?
Are you kidding? In the name of holy fruitcakes all over the world we do not criticize Christmas songs..no matter what!
Now repeat after me...I love rockin' round the Christmas tree...Ole ST.Nick by the Beach Boys and every rendition of Little Drummer Boy. We will cry at the shoe song every time it is played...and sing the 12 days of Christmas with love.
Now unless you don't want to get another pair of garments for Christmas....dummy up about the songs!
Your welcome!!

Donna said...

You know I'm kidding right?

Daina said...

Breath Of Heaven. Each time I hear it, it gets worse and worse.