Thursday, November 5, 2009

What madness possibly looks like

So I worked the Pioneer Woman event at the bookstore last night.

As you probably already know, Ree Drummond (aka the Pioneer Woman) is an incredibly well-known, likable blogger who has just written a lovely cookbook that is also a glimpse into her life on an Oklahoma ranch. Anyway, she's on a limited tour and TKE was lucky enough to host her here in Salt Lake City.

Well. People started lining up at 4:00 for an event that started at 7:00. AND they came from all over--some had even driven in from Oregon and LA. Everyone was friendly and funny and great, and the staff had worked hard to make sure we were organized and fair. But finally we had to cap the event because there. were. just. so. many. women.

Okay. I completely SUCK anyway at delivering news no one wants to hear. So for me to tell a crowd of fans that they couldn't get in to hear Ree AND that they might not even be able to get their books signed was daunting. Everyone was understandably disappointed. I would have been, too. And given the circumstances, they were gracious. But a few were completely enraged. They didn't just want to burn me in effigy. Dude. They wanted to burn me in person.

When Ree arrived, people screamed and clapped and pretty much threw their room keys at her. It was like watching the Beatles on the old Ed Sullivan show.

Okay. It's totally fun to be a fan. If Derek Jeter walked past me I would scream so hard I would probably slip a disk BECAUSE I'M OLD AND HAVE BACK TROUBLE. But wow. After witnessing what happened last night I wondered how it would feel to be the object of that kind of interest. Seriously, I cannot imagine it. At all.

Anyway. Ree was fabulous. And so were the customers and staff. And I hope that for the most part people walked away satisfied. It was an evening NOT to be forgotten.


Louise Plummer said...

This is the kind of writing career I wanted.

ann cannon said...

Yeah. It's definitely what I thought I wanted. But when you look at it up close and personal . . . I'm not so sure.

LucindaF said...

Boss: Ann, I need you to go out and lower the boom on all of these fan-girls.

Ann: Yeah, but see, I'm not a fan of conflict. I enjoy being an enabler. I fully accept that part of myself.

Boss: Ann, you're the cutest one here, they won't take you out.

Ann: Okay, but from now on, that sign that says no food or drink doesn't apply to me.

Boss: Done.

Ann: And if I spill crumbs? Cuz I do that you know...

Boss: overlooked.

Ann: And if I accidently go into a milkyway coma, or have to go to the bathroom sixteen times because of Dr. Pepper consumption?

Boss: Well... okay, but only one coma per week.

Ann: We've got ourselves a deal.

Ann: Listen up fan-girls, you're not making it through these doors.

Fan-girls: Boo, we want to burn you.

Ann: Yeah, guess what, Dr. Pepper isn't flammable and it's in every cell of my body. So go home haters. Be sure to read my column and buy my books. Love you!

Carolyn V. said...

Wow, that actually sounds a little scary.

Bob the Woodworker said...

Ann - Next time you need to call Bob the Woodworker, who would be willing to stand in as the TKE's bouncer (at least as long as it is women who need to be bounced) for a small fee. That's what woodworking (to say nothing of legal training) prepares a fella to do - get tough with the lumber!

Anne said...

OMGosh! I'm reading this for the first time and having a giggle! You're tougher than you think!